< Translator’s note: The original formatting of the stories has been preserved. The translations aim to remain as close as possible to each author's original wording and expression.

 

About 8 years ago, my dorm neighbor, who studied sociology, asked me for an interview.

The topic was discrimination against LGBT people. I remember that at the time I was convinced: I personally was lucky and everything was fine for me. After all, I had never been beaten or kicked out of home, so what discrimination?

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But now I am firmly convinced that there is no queer woman who has not experienced violence because of who she is. The question is only in the ability to identify it. Because we live in a system aimed at stigmatizing, “re-educating,” and erasing everyone who does not fit the norm. And the more you deviate from the expected рамки, the fewer your chances of being heard.

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My stories are far from the worst, but there is a whole kaleidoscope of them. Random drunk men on Khreshchatyk shouting at me and my girlfriend: “So are you prostitutes or lesbian girlfriends?” A whole series of situations under the code name “can I join as a third?” (once I showed the middle finger in response, and I was threatened with having my arm broken). A colleague who confessed his feelings to me, and when I said I had a girlfriend, said that it couldn’t be true (even though she picked me up from work every evening, and he saw it). Once I was followed after a march on March 8, and right near my building entrance, they poured water over me (yes, at first glance it doesn’t seem страшно, but it really affects your sense of safety — I kept looking over my shoulder every step when walking home alone). Sexual harassment from my father in messages (when I told my mom about it, he tried to shift her attention by reminding her that I am a lesbian). And of course, hundreds (over 10+ years of my online activity) of comments with wishes of death and calls to “get treatment.”

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Nothing truly horrible or tragic. Just dozens of more and less difficult situations that affected my psyche. At the same time, they opened my eyes to reality. This world is crazy — and it needs to be changed.

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Wine, she/her, 27; story shared in 2025 as part of the campaign “16 Days of Activism Against Gender-Based Violence.”